Category: Funyuns
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McGill suspended; belated justice for Adam Banks
For all of the ways The Mighty Ducks stretches or snubs the truth, the egregiously lenient minor penalty resulting from the McGill-Adam Banks incident has seen its share of real-life equivalents. From the NHL downward, every hockey league has baffled its viewers when one player lies out cold from a malicious or reckless hit while…
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13 NHL Valentines to Love and Share
Happy Valentine’s Day, lovely readers! Valentine’s Day is a time of love and companionship, of showing the people you love how much you love them with gifts and assorted romantic gestures. Of course, if you still haven’t found that special someone, you can always spend your time using Photoshop to make silly love-based puns about hockey. Which…
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The Essential Original Rock n’ Roll Christmas Songs, Part 2
We’ve fought the good fight, people. The insidious Christmas creep, and the endless stream of repetitive holiday music at least as far as terrestrial radio is concerned, has been beaten back over the last eight years from midnight on November 1st to some time between November 15th and (American) Thanksgiving day. But that doesn’t mean…
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Gary Bettman: Las Vegas expansion ‘a chance to build upon Coyotes’ success in the desert’
Author’s Note: Funyuns is an entirely satirical column and should never be taken seriously. LAS VEGAS — Is the NHL feeling lucky? Gary Bettman sure seems to think so. Citing the “remarkable opportunity” for his league to stake its claim as the first professional sports franchise in Nevada, Bettman — NHL commissioner and integral part…
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Funyuns: World Cup of Hockey Mannequins promises to be special
Anticipation has reached a fever pitch among hockey fans, as the countdown begins for the first annual World Cup of Hockey Mannequins. Department stores and clothing outlets across the globe will be represented by the finest expressionless dummies the retail space has to offer in the eight-team tournament. “We’re honored to be sending six of…